Premarital Counseling Alternative…

By Pastor Steve Durkac

afterthewedding

I believe in premarital counseling that is more educational base rather than problem based. I have sat with hundreds of couples in both pre-marriage and post-marriage “counseling” using some very simple biblical-based tools.

If you live in the Mobile, Alabama area, are approving of our Statement on Marriage and Sexuality and you want to meet to talk about your upcoming marriage or issues that are causing some concern, then I am happy to meet with you at our Chapel or at a Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts, depending on our schedules and locations.

 

   5 Love Languages

Dr. Gary Chapman’s 5 Love Languages book, seminar, and its principals for improving and empowering marriage relationships, is a powerful tool for helping your mate know how to love you and for helping you feel loved and helping them know you love them.

I use the 5 Love Language profile as the center piece of my premarital counseling  and marriage ministry because it’s a solution-focused tool and not a problem-focused tool. I can share with you many stories of marriages strengthened, healed, and filled with a new understanding of a loving relationship.

 

   Group & Couples Meet-Up

I am always happy to meet up with couples or individuals at our chapel or periodically I will hold a group gathering for a 5 Love Languages mini-seminar. If you are interested in meeting up to discuss the 5 Love Languages or are interested in being notified of scheduled 5 Love Languages group, please contact me.

 

   5 Love Languages Overview

Dr. Gary Chapman, in a video clip below, explains how he developed the 5 Love Languages. He is a licensed marriage counselor and a pastor who serves on staff of a Baptist church in North Carolina.

We all have a “love tank” that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others. Dr. Chapman divides love languages into five categories:

WORDS OF AFFIRMATION Compliments, words of encouragement, and requests rather than demands affirm the self-worth of your spouse.

QUALITY TIME Spending quality time together through sharing, listening, and participating in joint meaningful activities communicates that we truly care for and enjoy each other.

RECEIVING GIFTS Gifts are tangible symbols of love, whether they are items you purchased or made or are merely your own presence made available to your spouse. Gifts demonstrate that you care, and they represent the value of the relationship.

ACTS OF SERVICE Criticism of your spouse’s failure to do things for you may be an indication that “acts of service” is your primary love language. Acts of service should never be coerced but should be freely given, and completed as requested.

PHYSICAL TOUCH Physical touch, as a gesture of love, reaches to the depths of our being. As a love language, it is a powerful form of communication — from the smallest touch on the shoulder to the most passionate kiss.

 

   Wedding Officiating & Marriage Help

If you are planning on getting married along the beaches or area of Mississippi, Alabama, or NW Florida, please visit my personal wedding officiating website at www.durkac.com to learn more. You will also find several pages on marriage education, too.